Marshmallows
by Cometstrike
Summary: Ratchet is working on a new device when suddenly it backfires on him. After that, Clank takes a bath with him and touches a sensitive spot. This fic contains marshmallows. Rated T just to be safe, for some subtle references.


"Oh, freaking great, what the_ hell_ just happened?!"

Marshmallows. I was doing this for marshmallows, and it backfires on me.

Man, if there's one thing that I hafta have, it's marshmallows. Like, they're so soft and spongy. And they're sweet too, really, really sweet. And that's when you eat 'em out of the bag. No, things really get good when you put 'em over a flame.

I like mines half tan, half white. That way you can still have some of the sponginess on one side, then the melty stickiness on the other side. And then in the middle, where it's a perfect mixture of both textures.

The middle is the best part.

But you have to make sure you have the jumbo marshmallows, or you can't get that one blended texture flavor. Yeah, cause small one roast too fast, and medium sized ones always turn out blackened on one side, so you can't get the sticky part of it before it burns.

And when you bite into them, you kinda break that thin outer layer of marshmallow that formed when it comes into contact with air or CO2-now that-that is the second best feeling when eating marshmallows.

Oh, and when it's in your mouth, it kinda hardens some, so you can chew on it a bit before swallowing it.

An' sometimes when you're eating them and you bite into them, there's a string connecting the piece you bit off with the rest of the gooey side. And sometimes, the string of marshmallow falls. It can create a pretty big mess.

"Ratchet,_** what**__ on earth?!_"

Like now for example.

"See, I was trying to create this machine that could perfectly roast marshmallows," I explained, lifting my sticky arms up, "…but when I put 'em in the machine, it blew up because it overloaded. I put too much in there. And uh, as you can see…kinda made a big mess."

"Ratchet,_ look_ at this room! It will take ages to clean up! And look at_ you!_ I can barely see you through that coat of marshmallow on you."

"Clank, don't worry, I'll clean it up…" I was completely covered head to foot, in marshmallow, and I could barely move. Even my face was completely covered, except for my eyes. I'd been standing up when the machine self destructed, so right now I looked like a lombax snowman in the middle of a sticky winter wonderland that managed to make its way into our bedroom.

It wasn't that bad, actually.

"I refuse to believe that!" Clank was at the door frame, squinting into the room. Trying not to laugh at the glare he was shooting at me, I tried lifting my foot up, but I couldn't even move. The blast had superheated the marshmallows and when they cooled, it acted similar to how hot magma freezes when it comes in to contact with air or water. And it sure felt like it, 'cause I was cemented to the floor.

"Oh, this sucks badly. I need to get out of here." I said, trying to purposely annoy Clank. Stating the obvious in a dumb situation like this would certainly does _just_ that.

"Well, you will have to just stay there until I can find some way to get you out," Clank replied. He gestured around."Seeing as to how every single square inch of our bedroom is covered in a mixture of egg whites, syrup, and gelatin."

"You can just say marshmallows, pal." I said, and even though he couldn't see my expression through the mask on my face I'm positive he heard the smile in my voice.

Clank huffed and left the room.

After five minutes he came back, dragging something long and skinny. It looked like-

"Is that the gardening hose?!" I yelled. "What are you going to do with that? Don't you use it to water your Forget-me-Bot's?"

Clank didn't reply, instead grabbing the handle on the nozzle and turning it on, pointing it at me. I guess the sheer force of the water was too much for the little guy, and at the speed it was shooting out of the nozzle, it would've rivaled a fireman's hose.

At any rate, we both went sailing back at the same time.

I crashed onto my workshop bench-and immediately stuck to it by my back. I lifted my arms up and dropped them, exasperated. "Oh, _come on_, maaan! You're kiddin' me! I'm stuck!" I pushed myself up, feeling the wet marshmallow already begin to dry. "Oh crap-I need to get out of here before I stick to something else-"

I rolled of the bench, sticking onto the floor. I was several feet from the door, and I started dragging my wet body to it. Yeah, I know that sounded weird. "Almost there…almost there…"

Then finally I managed to get out of that freaking room, dropping myself in the middle of the hallway. I raised a fist and pumped it. "Yes!"

Clank was suddenly next to me. He pointed.

"Ratchet. Bathroom._ Now_."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm goin', I'm goin'…"

Clank stood my, waiting for me to get up (which took forever in itself) and drag myself to the bathroom. He followed me in, then shut the door behind him.

"Clothes off, Ratchet." He said, moving over to the bath tub to turn it on. For a minute I thought he wanted to take a bath with me, and I just stood there awkwardly for a moment. But he left after running the water without a backwards glance.

_Uh, how am I gonna get this outta my fur?_

I couldn't help but to wonder that as I peeled my clothes off, plopping them in a pile in the sink. I _did_ know that Clank was going to flip his shit when he saw that, though. Laughing aloud to myself I got into the bathtub, sinking down until l my head was the only thing out the water.

"Oh, _yeah_, that's the good stuff..."

I was going to put my head underwater when I got the chance, but at that moment, it felt like I was a day spa. I closed my eyes.

"Well, great. At least I know what not to do when I try to make a automatic marshmallow roasting machine, at the risk of it exploding. Uh, relatively speaking, of course."

I rolled over in the tub and opened my eyes.

Clank was suddenly standing in the middle of the bathroom with his arms folded, watching me expressionlessly.

After a five-second delay of me staring back at him I jumped up, yanking the shower curtains in front of me. "Clank, what the-_when_ did you-_how_-"

"I came back to see if you needed help," Clank told me, and I could tell by his eyes that he was trying not to laugh at my reaction.

"Wha?" I asked, confused. "What, are you going to take a bath with me?"

"Let's see. You have marshmallow on every part of your body." He said.

"Yeah, but my clothes blocked most of it!"

"Your ears are cemented to your head. I'm surprised you can hear at all."

"That's just my ears."

"It's all over your face. The only identifiable thing I can see about you now is your eyes."

"I can dive underwater."

"I'm pretty sure it got under your clothes. And didn't you tell me once it took you forever to get marshmallow off of your hands? That was a little bit then, and it does not appear that fur is a good place for sticky substances."

Eh, he had a point.

"Fine, all right…just don't fall in or anything, okay?" I told him. He reached into himself and pulled out a long scrub brush. My eyebrows jumped up. "Okay, _WHY_ do you have a extra-large brush with you?"

"Emergencies," He said, then came over and I guess he slapped it on the back of my head. I couldn't even feel it until Clank tried brushing. The brush stuck fast, and now he was engaging in tug of war with the back of my head.

"UGH,_ ow_-wait-" I cut in, after nearly getting scalped. "Let me wet my head first."

I held my breath and dived underwater for several seconds. I could feel the sticky substance loosening up in the hot water, and I started rubbing my head, getting it out from my fur. My ears unstuck from my head and now I could pull off my pilot's cap, which had also gotten stuck to my head.

As soon I came back up Clank's brush whapped me in the head again. But this time, I felt it and it kinda stung. Squinting one eye, I turned to him. "Uh, that was my_ head!_"

"Sorry. I wasn't paying attention. I was too busy looking at the pile of marshmallow-covered clothes in the sink!"

"Oh yeah. That was going to be temporary," I lied, not looking at him in the eye. "Can you get around my ears, they're still sticky a bit."

"Hold on, let me get up here…" Clank climbed up on the tub, and I felt myself trying not to jump out. He couldn't see anything under my waist because of the bubbles in the bathtub, but my sixth sense was acting up. I sat, thinking. Has he ever seen me naked? I mean, yeah, I walk around in boxers sometimes with nothing else, but anything past that would be me goin' commando. I noticed during those times Clank would watch me closely, expressionlessly. I never questioned why, I just figured he'd be curious about uh, organic anatomy. Hey, it was information, and if Clank loved anything, it was new knowledge.

But still…I hafta wonder what's running through the small robot's head.

"Ratchet. Hello?"

"Huh?" I blurted.

"I have been calling your name for the past thirty seconds. Now, bend forward."

"My ears aren't on my back," I said loudly.

Pause.

"…are they?"

"No! Had you been paying attention, you would've noticed that I got to your ears already."

"Oh…" I moved them. "Yes! Now I can hear!"

"Bend over."

"Okay." I said back, trying to stifle the laugh I had. That sounded really awkward, and I don't know if it was my immaturity or the bizarre fact that my friend was in the bathtub washing me, but I felt like blowing up with laughter. "My body's ready." I added, biting my lip. When I heard Clank make a questioning sound and felt the brush pause on my back I couldn't hold it in.

**_"HEH HA HA HA HA HA HAAAA!"_** I cackled, slapping the sides of the tub. I'm pretty sure the neighbors below us heard me.

"Ratchet, what has gotten into you? _Why_ are you in hysterics?" Clank wondered, even though I'm one hundred percent he knew why.

I was still giggling minutes later before I could answer him. I didn't even have to turn around to know that he was given me that unamused look I was so used to.

"Uh, nothing. I just remembered something…..from….. somewhere."

"Just sit still."

I bit my lip again, sitting patiently for about thirty seconds until I felt my ADHD kick in. That always happened to me when Clank and I were out in the field and I was blowing shit up all over the place and I was forced to be hyperaware and alert. But it did happen occasionally when I wasn't really physical. So now I couldn't stop fidgeting and I so felt like busting out in laughter for no particular reason as my adrenaline levels rose. I felt like blowing something else up too, and felt my hands wanting to grab the handle of a very explosive weapon.

"For _goodness_' sake, Ratchet! Stop moving!" Clank fussed at me, almost falling into the bathtub as I threw his balance off."What has gotten into you?"

"Wash my back please!" I gave a short, excited chuckle. "My back feels weird."

"Because you have not let me get to it yet! Now, do not move or else it's the kitchen for you tonight!"

"Okay, okay!"

After that I sat completely still, only moving when Clank asked me to so he could get another spot on me somewhere. At one point he got near the base of my tail with the brush and I dodged away laughing like a maniac because it tickled…and gave me another feeling as well, but I won't go there...

Clank's eyes smiled as he said, "I will have to get down there, Ratchet."

" NO, I can get around there myself!" I babbled quickly. "My tail's just…"

"…responsive?"

"Highly…" _In more ways than one._

"All right. I will leave now, Ratchet. " Clank told me. He walked along the edge of the tub while I stared straight ahead, thinking about all the possible things that could've gone wrong in the past five seconds. I saw Clank's head turn suddenly, looking down in the bathtub. He jumped off of the edge and walked to the door where he turned around.

"Ratchet."

"Yeah?"

"All the bubbles in the tub are gone."

I looked down quickly and saw that he wasn't lying. "Well, DAMN. Clank, did you see anyth-"

I heard the door close, but not before I heard a robotic voice laughing.

* * *

"What the-where are my clothes?"

Minutes later after I'd dried myself off, I finally realized that I didn't even have anything to put on. And no way in hell was I gonna put those marshmallow clothes back on. I waited impatiently for a minute, folding my arms and tapping my foot on the floor.

"_Hmmm._ I seem to be having some_ trouble,_" I said loudly. My voice echoed in the bathroom, so I know Clank had to hear me. When he still didn't come minutes later I decided to go look for him.

Wrapping the towel around my waist, I left out the bathroom, looking around for Clank. I didn't see him anywhere.

"Clank?"

I made it into the living room and saw a dictionary sitting upright on the couch. My eyebrows furrowed as I looked at it; I'd seen this millions of times. I walked over, then leaned over the book to see Clank's antennae tilting towards the page as he leaned forward with his face less than an inch from the book. I tapped it, trying to get him out of his self induced trance. That almost ALWAYS happens while he's reading, and he blocks off everything and everybody. I remember a time where Metropolis had a major thunderstorm and he somehow ignored it and stayed up all night, reading a medical dictionary from cover to cover.

Clank looked up impassively.

I waved a hand at him. He still wasn't back with me yet. "Clank. I need my clothes?"

"Clothes?" Clank repeated, then the bulb on his head flashed briefly as he snapped out of it. "-oh! Oh, I forgot to bring them to you…"

"Ah, don't worry pal. Besides, I can't even get into my closet because it's glued shut." I said, sitting down next to him. Now he looked at me with slight curiosity, in addition to…was that…

No, it couldn't be. Must've been my imagination...

"Ratchet, you are not wearing anything besides the towel on your waist," He said loudly, as if I didn't notice. I barked once with laughter at his obvious statement, then said, "I know, Clank. You don't mind, do you?"

He didn't say anything for a few seconds, and when I looked over at him he spoke: "No, of course not."

My eyebrow jumped up. "So, uh…what are we going to do about that room? I mean, we can't even walk in…"

"We will figure something out." Clank glanced sideways at me, then buried his head in the book again. "I am sure of it."

I was a bit perplexed by Clank's noticeable uneasiness. Maybe I should go find something to put on-he didn't seem to like being this close to an organic that was 99.99% naked. Wait-

I thought. I think I did leave some clothes in my garage, and I usually wore them when I was repairing or building something. And they'd escaped the marshmallow explosion-

"Pants." Muttered Clank from next to me. He snapped the book shut and handed it to me as I watched him, confused. "Here, Ratchet. I need to go buy pants."

And he grabbed his purse out of his compartment and left out the front door.

I stared after him, balancing the heavy book in my hands. I looked down at it frowning, 'cause it was heavy as hell. "How did he keep this balanced upright on the couch? And what about pants? He's too small for pants!"

* * *

I guess I must've fallen asleep because the next thing I knew I was opening my eyes and seeing nothing but darkness. Groaning, I looked at the clock.

"10:56. And I was supposed to be doing modifications on my Gyro-Cycle today. _NGHHHHH_."

Slightly annoyed, I stood up and started feeling around trying not to crash into anything, and my hands reflexivity grabbed for the towel that was supposed to be around my waist. Key word:

_Supposed._

I froze, feeling around my midsection. I wasn't against going completely naked and I was in my house, but I'm sure Clank was back by now and I didn't know if he was still awake in the house somewhere. But-

What the hell happened to my towel? And why did it feel like I was wearing…

"Pants…." I muttered. "I am wearing pants. My towel's gone. Pants are on me. I fell asleep. How did these pants get on me?"

I paused.

"_PANTS._"

I slowly reached into the pockets, out of instinct. My hands came into contact with something soft, and I pulled it out of both pockets.

I couldn't see what they were in the dark but I squeezed them in both hands and the texture felt familiar. I didn't know what it was until I ate one, and then it took me a fraction of a second to figure out what they were.

"_Marshmallows_."

* * *

**_A/N_**

**_Uh, I don't know, this just came to me while I was eating marshmallows... _**


End file.
